Trying to post anything at the moment is like attempting to wade through treacle, as my Mac is constantly beach-balling for no apparent reason – the swine started playing up the very day I upgraded OS to El Capitan, and has never been the same since. I’m in the middle of upgrading its RAM, and have been through endless screen freezes, Safe Boots, Recovery Boots, and have stripped back all unnecessary apps and stuff, emptying the trash along the way.
I should be plotting a chapter on Brief Interviews with Hideous Men for my PhD thesis, but how do you do that when all drafts are stuck inside the machine that’s not working properly? And no, I don’t have access to another computer. And yes, I do back up regularly.
So, for light relief I go into my phone to check what’s going down on Goodreads. @EmWatson’s #OurSharedShelf has chosen Caitlin Moran’s book, How to be a Woman, as its April read, and Emma Watson has posted some links. One of which is an article written by Moran in Esquire, titled: “12 Things About Being A Woman That Women Won’t Tell You: Except this woman (Caitlin Moran), who will.” In an attempt at cheering myself following the beach-balling hassle, I find reading the article in Russell Brand’s voice brings a touch of light relief to my situation – Moran’s and Brand’s laid-back-street-prose-style being quite similar in many respects.
Moran’s point 6 of 12 is Fear, reproduced here in its entirety because it’s quite short:
We’re scared. We don’t want to mention it, because it’s kind of a bummer, chat-wise, and we’d really like to talk about stuff that makes us happy, like look at our daughters — and we can’t help but think, “Which one of us? And when?” We walk down the street at night with our keys clutched between our fingers, as a weapon. We move in packs — because it’s safer. We talk to each other for hours on the phone — to share knowledge. But we don’t want to go on about it to you, because that would be morbid. We just feel anxious. We’re scared. Given the figures, we can’t sometimes help but feel we’re just… waiting for the bad thing to come. Because that would be a realistic thing to think, and we like to be prepared. Awfully, horribly, fearfully prepared.
Note the absence of the word that this fear is based upon: rape. Rape is alluded to, but never mentioned. It is mentioned elsewhere in the article, but here it is not. This is an interesting approach in that it makes Moran’s point 6 seem unnecessarily passive in tone – “waiting for the bad thing to come.” Is that an accurate view of all women? I’ll hazard a guess and say it’s not, for there are women who take more of an aggressive stance where rape is concerned. In spite of how it is written, point 6 motions towards a feeling that “rape culture” is really and truly embedded in contemporary Western culture (for anyone who’s interested, Laurie Penny discusses rape discourse and rape culture in the New Statesman).
Anecdotally, every woman I’ve ever met and with whom I’ve discussed the topic of rape has expressed that they have to consider their actions and/or dress on a daily basis. And when you’re doing that, and so are your friends, and so is your mother, and so on, it’s appropriate for fear to become the primary emotion, which strikes me as extremely unhealthy.