Is there a room where the famous writers can retire following the public event? I hope so. They’re all in attendance, supporting each other—it’s a veritable feast of literary dining for the paying public—but most wear a wearied look, forced to perform. You have to look closely to see it. They’re smiling, sure, but a commercial mask, a veneer separating them from the gathered crowd—the quiet, reserved members of the public, and the annoying, needy ones alike. A relatively new form of low for the literary geniuses must be the ‘posing for a selfie’ craze. There’s the mandatory line for book signings. Fair enough, you expect that. But now it’s not just a signature and polite chat with each person in the queue. Now, they come round to your side of the table. Most without even asking. They just assume it’s fine. They don’t see it as an invasion of your personal space, where you get to smell them, whether you want to or not, as phone swipes into camera mode. Wine on breath. Lipstick on lips. Perfume squirted goodness knows where. Lingering odour of tea (dinner). Faint waft of gum disease. They want to put their arms around you. You have to smile, look pleased to be a part of this. It seems to take an eternity. It’s rather unpleasant. I’m next in line. I can see the author’s utter distaste for this, but they’ve bought a book, so what are you gonna do? I offer to take the picture, so it’s not really a selfie. This, for two reasons. One: it makes a nicer picture for the couple in front of me. They both get to be in the frame with their literary idol. Two: it speeds the process, saving the literary genius from sitting through more of this torture. You see it in the eyes of the literary genius. Like a cow, drained of milk. Teets sore, struggling to lactate. That’s what the smile looks like. It’s a smile, but not a smiling smile. Aiming to please, you can see that, but the reality of the situation seeps through. You have to ask yourself… Is any amount of money worth this? My name, yes, it’s…
Tag Archives: Liverpool
The following posts provide two examples of graffiti photographed in a Manchester suburb, and a further two from Liverpool. Manchester and Liverpool are cities with a keen rivalry running between them, not least in terms of football (soccer), and so it is left to the reader/viewer to decide which city puts its creative talent to best use.
The posts are marked Not Safe For Work primarily because of the Manchester based graffiti, which contains language likely to offend. The Liverpool based graffiti is not offensive as such, but may jab at one’s sensibilities, depending on your thoughts on all matters scatological. This being said, Manchester is up first because chronologically speaking its examples of graffiti were captured first, with the Liverpool examples following soon after. All of them made me chuckle a little, and smile, which cannot be a bad thing. Hats off to those artists who create just for the sake of it.